Denbow's Deep Thoughts
Pat Denbow
Issue date: 10/26/06 Section: Humor
I've been here four years now and never once have I had a car on campus. Like not buying any text books - a feat I've done once again this semester - I've been forced to surround myself with some charitable chums. Getting home is sometimes a problem, but basketball regrettably, unbelievably, but perhaps conveniently takes up the fall, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and spring breaks, so it's no big deal. In all reality, I have no need for a car. Classes, church, food, the gym, and the bars are all within a Big Bertha drive, a short, simple saunter that needs no engine or tires.
With little purchasing power, limited funds, and a parental pair who refuses to throw down on even a pick-up, the chance to operate my own auto has cruised past me. I can talk the talk, and by virtue of no real alternatives, I've been forced to walk the walk. You get to know the surrounding area when you've walked to a downtown bank, Burger King, the country club, and Long John Silvers. A trek up the hill to Hollenbeck becomes just part of the routine. As the Proclaimers noted, I think I have walked 500 miles and I would walk 500 more just to be the man who walked a 1,000 miles. I'm getting there, step-by-step.
I despise mall-walkers, but I do enjoy a nice crisp pace when I set out for the day's adventures. I'm big on shortcuts, too. The grass isn't solely there to look pretty; you can cut across it to cut down on travel time. If WittLink had a campus MapQuest, I'd be the go-to-guy.
I still enjoy the stop and swoop of a fellow classmate driving up the hill on the way to class. There's nothing better than hopping in, getting dropped off, picking up a few minutes, and saving a couple calories. The thighs get a much-needed personal day. I feel like the casual pick up is way underused, though. There are far too many solo drivers out there. If you remotely know someone and have at least an open lap available in your car in the kinds words of Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dun, Pick'em Up!
Parking is certainly an issue on campus, but it shouldn't be. It's not the teachers or commuters who take up all the spaces; it's the lazy asses who can't bring themselves to take a sub ten minute two step. All it takes is a few less feet on the gas and a few more feet in the grass. I really believe it takes less time to walk to any of the academic buildings than to find a spot, try your unskilled hand at parallel parking, and then get to your classroom.
Simply walk to class. But if it means you've got to throw on the iPod, don't bother. Drive to class, throw in a CD, pick up some classmates, and, here's an idea, share not only a song, but a conversation, too...
With little purchasing power, limited funds, and a parental pair who refuses to throw down on even a pick-up, the chance to operate my own auto has cruised past me. I can talk the talk, and by virtue of no real alternatives, I've been forced to walk the walk. You get to know the surrounding area when you've walked to a downtown bank, Burger King, the country club, and Long John Silvers. A trek up the hill to Hollenbeck becomes just part of the routine. As the Proclaimers noted, I think I have walked 500 miles and I would walk 500 more just to be the man who walked a 1,000 miles. I'm getting there, step-by-step.
I despise mall-walkers, but I do enjoy a nice crisp pace when I set out for the day's adventures. I'm big on shortcuts, too. The grass isn't solely there to look pretty; you can cut across it to cut down on travel time. If WittLink had a campus MapQuest, I'd be the go-to-guy.
I still enjoy the stop and swoop of a fellow classmate driving up the hill on the way to class. There's nothing better than hopping in, getting dropped off, picking up a few minutes, and saving a couple calories. The thighs get a much-needed personal day. I feel like the casual pick up is way underused, though. There are far too many solo drivers out there. If you remotely know someone and have at least an open lap available in your car in the kinds words of Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dun, Pick'em Up!
Parking is certainly an issue on campus, but it shouldn't be. It's not the teachers or commuters who take up all the spaces; it's the lazy asses who can't bring themselves to take a sub ten minute two step. All it takes is a few less feet on the gas and a few more feet in the grass. I really believe it takes less time to walk to any of the academic buildings than to find a spot, try your unskilled hand at parallel parking, and then get to your classroom.
Simply walk to class. But if it means you've got to throw on the iPod, don't bother. Drive to class, throw in a CD, pick up some classmates, and, here's an idea, share not only a song, but a conversation, too...
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